Thursday, October 24, 2013

His Princely Heritage

[image from]

I've been meaning to do this post for a while now, ever since I changed my online moniker to princelySid. This post is mostly for my French fan and friend, Sgyreju, because she asked.

I had gone for dinner with my church group; it was somewhere we could all socialise that was a little free and we could all dress up for the evening. I sat at a table with 5 other people: 4 were friends of mine but one I didn't know so I felt it would be good to get to know a little about her, you can never know too many people or have enough friends.

We talked about ourselves a bit, where we went to school and stuff and then she mentioned that she was Ugandan. She then told me that she has several names that one of them actually means "daughter of princess". She said technically she was a member of the Ugandan royal family.

I immediately took the conversation in that direction by telling her that I'm part Ugandan (quarter) from my mum's side. I then launched in to a story about how I was given another name when I went to stay there with my mum while I was a child. The name was my great-grandfather's, Mukasa Kalanzi Yusuf. I went on to tell her how he was a chief and related to the royal family, the Kabakas, and how I was like six thousandth in line to the throne or something.

Side note: I've always been extremely proud of my Ugandan family for this reason.

When she heard the name she interrupted me and said she thinks from the name that he was actually a prince! In fact he was probably one of the Kabaka's brothers. I was stunned. I mean, I knew he was a big deal, my mother had been telling me stories of him, his palace and what it was like living there for years but I didn't know he was a prince!

I immediately called over my mum, who had organised the dinner, and asked her if she knew that her grandfather was a prince and she said "I don't know Sidney, probably, he was related to the Kabaka after all. I've forgetten those things… Yeah I think my mum was a princess" Nkt!! Trust her to just 'forget' something that interesting.

I continued to talk to my new friend about her culture, one that I had read but never really experienced. She told me that all members of the royal family were taken at a certain age to a sort of camp where for two months or so they learnt about their history and heritage, how they were expected to behave and their duties as members of the royal family. I thought that was one of the coolest things I ever heard and told her so. I also said I'd have loved to attend something like that (always loved history), she said that she had found it mostly a drag but I think she was also quite amused and happy to have met someone so interested in her and her culture.

We didn't get to talk too much because her attention was being pulled by other people and I was also helping my mum by hosting the event.

On the way home the fact that I was related to a prince kept ringing in my head. I've never really liked the name I was using, cdooh, because it had one too many 'o's; I wasn't very satisfied with it. I thought since I was related to princes, princesses and by extension kings my new moniker should show this. I felt princeSid was just too arrogant and not true but princelySid hinted at any one who thought about it more than 4 seconds about my heritage.

The ever kooky Patrick
 [image from]
Sgyreju was right when she said it was a lot to live up to. It's either that or I go Patrick's 
(Spongebob's best friend) way "Because I have a relative that has accomplished so much I never feel the pressure to accomplish anything too extraordinary because they already did" :D

My mum's side has another interesting connection; her father is the descendant of the tribe's rain makers. I should find out more about that too. My dad's side has no remarkable heritage or history, at least none I've heard of anyway. I should ask him about it.

So that was how I got to princelySid. I like it a lot. I don't think I'll be changing it any time soon, unless I found out something like I was descended from some ancient pagan god. Can you say godlySid? Peace!!!

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Spoken HeArt

[image from]
Spoken HeArt is a creative and performing arts club in Maseno University that was started in 2010 by a spoken word artist called Pink Poet and a few other artists, rappers, singers and the like. Pink wanted a place where artists from around our university could come together and perform. That way you'd be able to improve your art and gain confidence from the comments and critiques of other artists.

The sessions are usually on Thursday and scheduled to begin at 19:30 and are supposed to end at 21:30, but I can tell you after 3 years of attending these meetings, not once has one ended before 10pm. There's a list that goes round and if you feel like performing you can just write your name down, together with what you do and you'll be called up to perform at some point.

I joined Spoken HeArt about 3 years ago. I saw a poster on one of the notice boards in school and since it talked about poetry and art I thought I'd go and check it out. Until then, I had only attend one spoken word event, Wamathai's, and it was a lot of fun.

What I found there was a collection of incredibly talented people. The types of people that inspire you to greatness, bring you to tears, stir your emotion or simply make you gasp in surprise. Now, I'm not saying that everyone was world class, but it provided you with a space to grow, to improve.

For almost 2 years, I attended the meetings as an audience member; watched maybe hundreds of performances. One particular Thursday we had maybe 12 people in attendance and Pink felt that since we don't have so many people in attendance everyone should perform, which was cool considering the other 11 people were artists everyone except me.

I didn't really know what I was going to do. I didn't have any performing art skill, but then I thought of something  I had been thinking of for some time. I always thought that I was a great story teller it was why I had a blog and why I have mad game.

When my turn came up I did a piece that inspired the post on the dudes my sister should stay away from. It was a heady moment when I realised that people liked my story. That I could make a large group of people of laugh and relate to my stories.

I've done tens of stories since that first one. I think I've improved massively since then. But for me the best thing about Spoken HeArt isn't that I get to perform in front of people or that I can put my pieces to a new audience; it's that real artists respect me, the "fake" artist, as creative and artistic. Even more than this is something that happened last week, a poet called Iyad, performed my post on Kenya Power in front of the entire club. It was a big moment for me.

Spoken HeArt is probably the only place where someone like me can do what I do. If you're ever in Maseno on a Thursday night, feel free to drop by and show us what you can do. Any skill that can be displayed in front of people is welcome. Peace!!!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Picture: Flirt and Die

One last one before I leave the lab... This is so funny and creative. Peace!!
image from

Picture: Did You Study?

Hey guys!! Since I don't have a phone that can tweet, I'm stuck using my computer to keep up with stuff online. So instead of sharing to twitter, I'll share here:) Found this today while in class and burst out laughing because it's actually happened. Hope it brightens your day. Peace!!!
image from

Sunday, October 13, 2013

My Upstart TV Audition!!!

Last weekend was one of many happenings (can I say that? Or rather does that make sense to you guys?), but I'd like to talk about what happened on Sunday morning: the Upstart TV auditions.

I was awakened at 8.30am by my cousin, shouting at me to wake up and go for the auditions; I had gone out the night before and gotten thoroughly inebriated so I was hangovered that morning. I probably wouldn't have woken up if I hadn't glanced at my phone.

6 Messages Received

"Fuck!! When did all these come in?" A quick glance at them told me only one was important and that was because of the name of the sender; Baby.

"I'm in Kisumu now, when you ready let me know we meet up and go for the auditions."

"Fuck!!!! Now I really have to go!" It was because of me that she had come all the way to town from school this early on a Sunday morning, I couldn't disappoint her. She has this way of letting you know that she's disappointed in you that transcends words. After she's done with you you'll practically beg her to give you a chance to make up for it. Well that's how she makes me feel anyway, it could just be me.

I struggled out of bed and made my way downstairs, shirtless. I've never been shy about my body and I've been in the best shape of my adult life recently. I had my cousin feel my abs :D. Anyway after I collapsed on the couch to get my mind straight. That took just over an hour, though it felt more like 3. In that time, my cousin, my niece and the maid had left for church – leaving me with clear instructions on where to leave the keys to the house when I got round to leaving, I licked some sugar and immediately regretted it (it left a bad taste in my mouth), I took a shower, leaving my clothes all over the sitting room floor (I'm not sure who picked those up, actually I'm not sure who cleaned up after me because I'm sure that I left a big mess) and I left for town.

Kisumu is generally a hot town, imagine Mombasa with far less humidity(or a sunny hot coastal city). When you're recovering from the effects of excessive drinking it's almost unbearable, but at times like that, it's better to concentrate on the beautiful girl you're going to meet and not the heat.

Me and Baby met at the stage and headed for the audition, which was taking place at the Tom Mboya Labour College, my first time being there. I can't really give you a description of the place because I wasn't paying that much attention, and since my phone is otherwise busted I don't have pictures. We registered in some tents that were set up at the end of the driveway and got our audition numbers. We were then told to wait under some shade and that was when my audition experience really started.

I was sitting there talking to Baby when a white lady came to talk to us; her name was Kelly. She had on a black t-shirt that had the Upstart logo on it and also those of the sponsors there (I'm not going to mention them, they're not paying me!!) Kelly's nice, she joined in our conversation asking us about ourselves and where we were from and such. Me being me I quickly launched into a myriad of stories about myself, Baby (Kelly was jazzed when I called Baby by that name), Kisumu and school. Kelly said "I hope your not all talkative and funny out here and when you get in front of the judges you go all silent on me"

At some point, we went into the antechamber (cool way of saying waiting hall) where our numbers were pinned onto our chests and a mic was attached to me, as I was to be the first to audition, and I went into the audition room, headache forgotten.

There were 3 judges, two dudes and a lady. They asked me a number of questions that I don't really want to describe here but I will tell you of the one that floored me completely. They asked if I met Bill Gates, who I already called my role model, on an elevator and he was going to the twentieth floor what would I say in that time to make me unforgettable.

I told them what anyone who had never thought of that question would, how he was my role model, that he inspired me and a lot of other uninspired shit. They stopped me like 1 minute in and said, as Bill Gates, "I hear this all the time thanks, go away" at which point I replied almost angrily "You've given away billions of dollars in your lifetime and you're going  to be an asshole to one kid on an elevator?"

Really, I've never thought of what I'd do if I met Bill now, whenever I imagined meeting him it was always as equals, one billionaire founder to another, I wouldn't have to struggle to be memorable :-D

I think I may have come off as a little pompous (I've been looking for an opportunity to use this word) to the judges, several times while I was talking I think I saw several smiles of incredulity on the judges faces. Either that or I'm a funny guy.

After I left the audition room I stuck around to give Baby moral support. I heard laughter from the room and I know she did brilliantly.

I think now would be a great time to talk about Baby a little more. She's a short, brown awesome girl. I've known her for over 3 years, but we really got close two years ago when she was my next door neighbour for about a year. It was then I took to calling her Baby, the only girl I've ever called that in my life. She's special to me in several ways that words don't seem appropriate to describe because they just come up sounding hollow and fake. She's spanky, clever and all kinds of fun to be around.

We did an interview together afterward together where they asked us a lot of questions about each other. We know each other pretty well so I think we did okay. I should mention at this point that most of the crew were pretty funny, funny in a way that you didn't want to leave, that you wanted them to be your friends. I'm not sure if that's how all media crews are but this one seemed an extremely creative bunch.

Just as we were leaving we were called back. I HAD GOT IN, Baby hadn't :(. I was so excited I started doing a little jig. My mum says I can't dance much but that's never stopped me. We did another short interview about me getting in and her not and then we left.

Even the fact I had no idea how it would schedule with school and stuff couldn't stop my excitement. So I'll end this blog post with the words I've been repeating to myself a lot since then… TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! TV!! I'm going to be on TV!! Peace!!!

Friday, October 11, 2013

For When You Contemplate Suicide

Hey guys! If you've been reading this blog from the beginning, you know that I've contemplated suicide before. I was going through a difficult time in my life: depression and anger, and felt that there just may be one way out.

Obviously I didn't do it. There were many reasons why but the main one was my baby sister. Contemplating suicide changes your view on life, you're never quite the same again.

Anyway I came across this video that kinda explains why you shouldn't kill yourself, it's by Anna Akana who had her sister commit suicide. Take a few minutes to listen to it, it covers a lot of the thought's that prevented me from taking my own life

ION. My editor is back to blogging, check out his reviews of Tusker Project Fame here . Peace.

Friday, October 4, 2013

When They Start to Grow Up

[image from] 

A few months ago I took a break from school to go home and see my mother, brother and sisters. It was just a couple of days, but by the end of it I came to the uncomfortable realisation that my baby sister was growing up. I don't like it one bit.

I had gone out, and came back late, lat/e here being past my baby sister's bed time. I walked in and found her sleeping on the couch, in her pyjamas. She had refused to go to sleep without seeing me first and had fallen asleep waiting. She looked so cute.

I picked her up and carried her to my mum's room (they sleep together). My mum was already in bed reading the bible. As I let her slide through my arms and on to the bed, I felt a kind of soft area around her chest area. It took me a while to realise what it was I had felt, but when it did, it hit me like a tonne of bricks. My baby sister, my reason for living, the innocent little thing, has started growing boobs!!!

Reeling from this realisation, I asked my mum "Joy has boobs?!" "Yeah. She's growing up." "But she's still so young!!" "Yeah they come and go but she's of the right age. These days she even insists on wearing bras" "Bras?!!!" "Not the real thing just like tank top things" Look on my face: THE FUCK?!

I left the room and realised that if she's already growing boobs then the phase I'm most fearing is almost here: BOYS(yuck). Now my sister is already well informed on matters sex (well HIV/AIDS) they began basic sex education in class 1; on top of this my sister is rather intelligent (too much for her own good in this case) so I'm not really worried about what she does. What I don't like is the attention she'll be getting and the potential thoughts these boys will be having about her.

Whenever I thought of my baby sister at that stage I always envisioned her with a bodyguard of sorts, who I pay, to keep boys away and protect her. The bodyguard would be female so that there can be no funny business between them.

I love my sister more than my own life. There was a time she was my sole reason for living. She sits on a pedestal that is unspoiled by life in my heart. She stays pure. I love my other sister a lot but she's practically the same age as me(if you believe that girls mature faster she's older), I can only give her advice and hope that she listens-she mostly does- but with my baby sis she still listens to me with complete obedience, but who knows what comes with adolescence?

This is what I fear most. Peace!!!